Thursday, April 21, 2011

Time Flies

It's been 10 years since my sister died. Yesterday, April 10th, as I have done for 10 years, I along with my sister Abby, released balloons in memory of. What a beautiful day it was too. The wind was gentle so the balloon just took to the sky like it knew it's destination. I have often wondered over the last 10 years where the balloons make their landing, or do they land? Do they bust in the atmosphere? Do they land on a telephone wire or in someone's back yard? If so, is some stranger reading the messages written on the balloons? I hope someone finds them and reads the messages and wonders who this Amy person is. They would know how loved she was. Wouldn't it be amazing if my balloon being launced from Texas actually caught up with Abby's being launched from Virginia? Now that would be something! Silly right? I think about Amy being in Heaven and wonder if she can see that every year on the anniversary of her death we remember her this way? I can only hope that she is at peace in Heaven and all of her pain is no more.

Time flies and nothing is for certain except change. God is awesome, people are crazy and if you find true love - hold onto it. Don't ever let it go.

My Time..I Mean My Training @ The Beach :)

Needing a little refresher course for my new position, I have spent the last three days on Galveston Island with one of the most dedicated professionals I know.  She is the Business Office Manager at a sister facility here in Galveston, The Meridian. So, when the business day was done I had a little extra time on my hands before turning in for the night,  I decided to walk the halls of this magnificant building. While touring the facility, certain artifacts I am told came to live at The Meridian from The Buccaneer Hotel, which on New Years Day in 1999 was imploded. My favorite piece is the Mantel that surrounds the fire place near the main dining hall. The rich dark wood with it's pristine glow hugs the fireplace adding warmth and giving one a sense of comfort, that while the past is just that..the past, we can bring with us items, things, feelings, artifacts, etc to the future that are good and can provide opposed to bringing negative things, baggage such as anger, hurt, disappointment, etc with is a choice.

As I stroll among the quiet, yet peaceful halls I discovered the most amazing of all spaces here at The Meridian. This little gem is tucked in a corner and if you were not looking for it, you just might miss it. I have always loved to read and as a child, going to the Library was a treat. I would walk the isles crammed with books, rows and rows of knowledge and history awaiting my arrival. As I walked into the Library here at The Meridian, I felt the familiar love of reading I had as a child resurface. Although strange to some,  I realize, I love the smell of old books, the printed pages full of history comfort my soul.

 Despite this small space tucked away from the main stream of things, it was as if I had stepped into another world. I could almost hear the stories being told that were contained in shelved books. Technology has come so far that perhaps one day Libraries such as this one will be no more. And that shall be a very sad day indeed, for a hand held device containing words does not a book make. Technology cannot replace the feel and smell of history that a beloved little corner filled with books can.

Now I'm off to read my book.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Spring Is In The Air

Spring has never been one of my favorite seasons growing up and has become the mose dreaded for me as of the last 10 years. I love Autum and of course Winter, but this time of year could just pass me by and I would not miss it. Don't get me wrong, I love the flowers blooming and the beautiful trees and green grass, and in fact, here in Texas, the Bluebonnets almost make April a bearable month for me.

I pause today and remember my brother, Kenneth Andrew Clark, who lost his battle with Cancer three years ago this week. And just as soon as I think I have gotten past Ken's death, April 10th comes along and reminds me how much I miss my sister Amy who passed away 10 years ago.

My prayer is that they are together, along with Kathy as well and they are enjoying the relationship that they did not have while on earth.

My siblings you are terribly missed by many people.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Remembering Those We Have Loved & Lost

Today's if the first day of April. A bright sunny day from my spot in front of my window. I dedicate my very first blog today to Amy and Kenny. Two truly amazing people that passed away leaving empty spaces where warmth and love and amazing talent use to live.

As a child,  Amy was my savior, my warrior, my advocate, my friend. She was also my Sister. I often think if I could have just one more day to sit and have coffee with her I would tell her all of the things that I did not say while I had the chance, while she was alive. I would tell her I loved the sound of her voice, the smell of her hair on her pillow when I was a child and slept beside her in the small hole in the wall. I would tell her I loved the way she picked the weeds out of her flower beds and how beautiful her handwriting was. I would tell her that, as a child, had it not been for her, I don't know that I would have survived my life. Amy was Christmas to a child who was not allowed to have Christmas. She saved me from myself.

Kenny - your passing left so many words unspoken. Like so many untimely deaths, the world lost a truly amazing artist. I admire the strength with which you fought your fight and I pray that Heaven welcomed you and I know your pain was washed away. I regret the conversation we did not have as time did not allow me to be at your side, but I know you know what I would have told you.

The deaths of Amy and Kenny have made me realize that not one day should pass without telling those you love how they inspire you, what little things you admire about them and certainly how much you love them.

 Today and everyday I remember you, Amy & Kenny.